will an orphan stays an orphan forever?

what am i afraid of? 

i want to be in the past and present at the same time. knowingly the past is just purely impossible to be in, why do i still torture myself for that? its been months. why do i even have to care? its none of my freaking business. good thing is that, i'm starting to accept the fact that things has changed. 

on another hand, the present. how sure are you? 

being too conscious makes someones thinking really negative. so negative that i dont feel im worth it anymore. wtf. ok maybe i shouldnt think like that.... im awesome. -.- 

those who are eventually leaving, please leave now. those who will stay in till the end, please stay. 

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story telling time

theres this orphan named K. she was taken care of her biological family since young, they loved her . but due to certain circumstances , her family disowned her. she was lost, she felt unwanted, she felt all the bad things anyone could ever think off. 

till one day, theres this kind hearted family treated her nicely. she was overwhelmed that she felt there was a motive. she felt surreal. she felt scared. their kindness kept her thinking, is she really wanted? or they're just really nice people who treats her right?  because everything went too fast, too fast for her to accept the fact they she was well treated. the thing is, is it only temporary?

ok end of story. 

whats the first thing you see in this picture?
the sun or the shadow?
the bright side or the dark?


or, beyond the dark you see light? lol whatever.



wtf am i emoing. kbye